Who are you?
Heart of Humboldt is based in northern California in, well, the heart of Humboldt County. Humboldt marijuana is world renowned. We love the cannabis plant and feel passionately that people have a right to use it, which is why we are supplier of mail order marijuana.
Why should I trust you?
Because we understand that buying marijuana is scary. And because we are nice. Also because we’ve been selling mail order marijuana since 2010 (you might have met us on one of the online markets) without anything bad happening.
We know how to seal, pack, disguise, and ship your order to ensure nothing harshes on your mellow, and we only deliver the top quality mail order marijuana that you’re looking for.
Why should I buy from you?
Four reasons: quality, cost, convenience, and we give you free gifts with every purchase.
Quality: Humboldt County is known worldwide for growing the best marijuana in the world. As the south of France is to wine, as Kentucky is to bourbon, as Russia is to vodka (and also to using long, cold winters to defeat invaders), as the 1927 Yankees are to baseball, Humboldt County is to marijuana. The best in the world, bar none.
Cost: Compare our price to what you pay for local weed. You’ll see there’s no reason to put up with decent weed from somewhere else when you can smoke Humboldt’s finest for a comparable price.
Convenience: What could be easier than ordering online and having product delivered to your door? Even if you live in a marijuana-legal state, it’s still easier to order online. Mail order marijuana is just easy. That’s why people buy from Amazon and Ebay: it’s easier and more convenient than going to the local store. Bitcoin may seem difficult at first, but at first Paypal scared us too. Starting with Bitcoin isn’t any more difficult than setting up your first Paypal account, and once you’ve done it, you’re set with a way to buy top quality weed for life. Not bad, eh?
Free Gifts: With every order we include a free marijuana edible. And these edibles are strong. One small bite will fracture your seconds into a million tiny bits, and a whole one at once seems to stop time altogether. If you eat a whole edible at once, do not blame us if you get drool all over your couch. The edibles are either brownies or truffles. They come in regular, vegan, and gluten-free.
But wait! There’s more! (You knew there would be.) For a limited time only, because we know how much weed connoisseurs love to try new strains, and because we love weed and love you, with each order we will send a tiny sample (enough for a couple of bowls) of a surprise strain. Who knows, you may find your new favorite!
What can I expect after I order?
We zip most orders out within 24 hours. You should have your selection within 3-4 days. Your Humboldt bud will be double-sealed, wrapped in Tyvek, and packed in a fresh, flat-rate box. We promise—all the dank stays on the inside! We use a variety of professional return addresses and mail from a range of different post offices in California and Oregon. Mail order marijuana is safe and fast.
Can I use a fake name?
Please don’t. The post office is incredibly smart and also computerized. They know who lives where. If the name on a piece of mail doesn’t match the known residents, it will not be delivered.
Especially don’t ask us to send to “Fred Flintstoned” or “Max Bud,” or “Mary Jane Blunt,” or even “Herb Grassley,” unless your name actually is Herb Grassley (in which case: Dude!).
Can I send my order to another address?
If you have a kind friend who will accept mail for you, sure. But the name has to be a real person who really does live there.
Do I have to sign for my package?
Never. All orders are shipped USPS priority and no signature is needed.
What if my order doesn’t arrive?
If your order doesn’t arrive in a week, first: don’t panic. Take a Bake Break if you need one. But it will be fine. Then contact us.
We keep all the tracking numbers. Together, we can check up on your package and see where it is. One of four things can happen.
- USPS says it’s still en route. Mail can be delayed due to holidays, weather, or good old human error. Yay! All you have to do is wait and it will arrive.
- USPS update stops being updated. That means your beautiful bud is truly lost. That’s sad, because it will probably end up in the mail recovery center in Atlanta, GA, where it will be incinerated, and if good bud is going to burn, someone should get the benefits. But we will move past our grief together: a replacement order will be winging its way to you as fast as we can get it out, at no new charge.
- USPS says it’s “Undeliverable as addressed.” That means you gave us a bummer address. We can’t replace your order.
- USPS says it was delivered. We can’t replace an order that was delivered. You might want to check your neighbors in case it was left at the wrong house. Sad to say, it might also have been stolen out from under you. Some culprits to consider: your shifty roommate, her basement-dwelling boyfriend, or your teenage children (they were so little once…).
Can I mail order marijuana using PayPal or a credit card?
Alas, until the Queen of Plants is free to roam the land without government interference, no, it isn’t safe for either of us.
What is bitcoin?
Bitcoin is a digital currency. You can learn about it here:
We don’t really understand it, either. But that’s okay. What matters is that it’s anonymous and perfectly legal to use Bitcoins
How do I get some?
A good place to start is Local Bitcoins. You can find sellers offering bitcoin through paypal, credit cards, Western Union, or even in-person with cash.
Bitcoin can seem intimidating at first glance, but once you learn your way around it, it really is easy.
Okay, bitcoin is anonymous. But my mailing address isn’t.
That’s true. You have to send us your address. How you do that is up to you. You’ve got three options. From least secure to most secure they are:
- Type your address into the address field on the order page.
- Put your address in a privnote. Privnotes are encoded messages that self-destruct automatically once opened. They’re very simple to use. Learn about Privnotes here:
- Use PGP encryption. PGP takes some time to learn, but it can be done. This is the most secure option for communicating online. This is a good tutorial:
http://cryptorials.io/how-to-send-encrypted-messages-with-pgp-the-easy-way/You can find our PGP public key here.
Do you take international orders?
Yes, but you have to order at least an HP (half pound). Email us if you want to chat about that. Humboldt marijuana has an international reputation for a reason!
I have a question about…
Email us! We are here to help!
Why the bunnies?
They made you smile, right?